The Groom’s Bride

-Story: [3 out of 5] The original intent of the ‘story’ criterion of critic is to answer the question “can I sit another person down and tell them this story… if I can, will they be entertained?” If yes, definitely then the story is a go. And for this movie? Heck yeah, you can sit me down any day in a tales by moonlight format and I’ll listen to it. (As a side note though, this iROKO+ subscription is really paying off sha haha see Jason saving me serious green). 

-Originality: [2 out of 5] When the movie started and before all the drama, I was getting a strong “Princess Tyra” vibe from the movie with the whole wealthy versus peasants and the whole Jackie Appiah and a sick relative (if you catch my drift). However, the rest of the movie is a tad bit different from the usual

-Predictability: [1 out of 5] Yes, indeed. A majority, if not all, the sequences and happenings in this movie are extremely predictable. 

-Directing/Editing: [4 out of 5] Ah! A one part movie…. I have now lived a fulfilled life! Lol. Kudos to the Venus team for a couple of things. First off… I don’t see the Bollywood movie that this was stolen from (and trust me and my negativity to have been searching rigorously). The cinematography was obvious. No faults whatsoever (none that I noticed anyways… I am sure that someone will point out a flaw in the comments section after this abi?). But most importantly… one part film! Ha! It can be done… hence… from now on let’s begin to do it. I saw what they did with Majid’s family… because Kofi (a charcoal) was playing the father of Majid (a whitey), they gave him a ‘might-as-well-be-caucasian’ mother and a light skinned brother… nice casting. Over the years, Venus Films Production have been known for their ridiculously wordy dialogues. But it seems they are making a serious attempt at changing… they switched over from the Shakespearean language to simple overly wordy English sometime in 2009-2010 and now they are almost at normal human dialogue levels… kudos! 🙂

-Acting quality: [3 out of 5] Let’s start with the obvious… Majid got fatter! (ofcourse that would be the most important thing to me. This guy is destroying my fantasies lol). On to matter though… Majid is a great actor. The fact is undeniable and not even a question. JJ Bunny… Hmm… Joy Bunny… hmm…. I’ve reviewed a couple JJ Bunny made in Houston crapologies on this blog before. It is no secret that I never thought any good of them. And neither did I think the babe could act to save her life.. but! In this movie, something has changed. JJ has definitely become a better actress than her “The Bet” days. I don’t know if to credit it to practice/experience or good directing. Whatever it is the fact remains that she has gotten better than before. Mba! She’s not yet there… in fact she is no where near there yet but she has gotten better. Even if it’s by a ridiculously minuscule scale… an improvement is an improvement. Now, having said that… the babe still can’t speak English o lol… haha. It’s pronounced ‘cheating’ darling, not ‘shitting’ (you know what they say… no matter how posh you try to be, the villager in you will always surface). Jackie Appiah… ah ah! This my madam and all this her African accents. In this movie, it’s a Gambian accent and in “Battle of Honor” it was a Jamaican accent. Any which way, the girl did her role justice. I think she did a good job, if you disagree, that’s your own cup of tea. It was a pleasure to see Kofi ‘the beast’ Adjorlolo and our darling Amanobia Boakyi from “Somewhere in Africa“, on the screens again. The kid who played ‘Nick’, Majid Michel’s brother, (real name, Nass), I was at a loss as to whether or not he could act… (plus his voice? He looked like a kid yet he sounded double the age he looked). He gave an OK performance for a first timer. The woman that played Majid’s mother, couldn’t act… which was fine at first cos she didn’t need to express emotions. But when we came to the Gambia… emotions needed to be shown that she quite frankly was just not showing. All the extras that could not act were quite frankly simply reciting the dialogue in my opinion. Oya… I saved the most important (in my books) for last. James ‘o sexy nation’ Gardiner (Yes! I really just dashed the guy Omotola’s title. Shoot me). I remember the first time I saw him was in the movie, “Wrong Number” and my only thoughts back then were “Omo see fine boy” but as time progresses it has become obvious that Mr. Gardiner has big plans. His first major role that I ever saw was alongside Jackie Appiah in the theft of a movie, “A Night With Her“. Back then I thought… “eh! He could still use some work. Not exactly lead material yet” But now? Hian… the boy has proven me wrong. Even from the trailer alone…you can see the wealth of emotions he is capable of. I am literally astounded by the rate of growth of this guy both talentwise and popularity-wise. In the words of Wizkid my dear “God go make you bigger”. (Dear John Dumelo, this is the second time I’m writing you. See what I’m telling you? There are other fine chocolate men coming out of Ghana that can act. Do you know the difference between you and them? They actually visit the gym. I’m telling you now o for the gazillionth time…. better join a gym before I replace your place in my heart).

-Setting: [5 out of 5] It showcases the beauty of Africa from two perspectives: Gambia and Ghana (shot on location in Ghana and Gambia)

-Costume/Make-Up: [4 out of 5] To the Ghanaians and to Samira Yakubu… I apologize deeply. Ah! I have done you a great injustice. I hype Uche Nancy and Chiemela Nwagboso (both Nigerian film costumiers) to the death. Yet! You have been in the game since tey tey and I never acknowledged your existence… chei! The big things you’ve been doing, dear Samira, will never go unnoticed. Just like Bernie Anti is to Ghana what Austine Erowele is to Nigeria, Samira Yakubu is to Ghana what Uche Nancy is to Nigeria.

-Video Quality: [4 out of 5] Splendid

-Soundtrack: [4 out of 5] Ahah! Bernie doing his tinnnnn. Listen to the soundtrack below

-Musical Score: [4 out of 5] Before the movie even started (as in, before the actors came on screen), you can tell that this is a Bernie Anti work. That’s how you make a name for yourself. Astounding.