In The Cupboard

-Originality: [1 out of 5] The concepts within the story, the whole mysterious/disastrous family theme has been done before and ‘in the cupboard’ lends it a new lens. Roger Quartey is another person who had tried to do one of these burial revelation storylines with “Turn Me On” starring John Dumelo, Jackie Appiah and Yvonne Nelson. Personally, I was more entertained by that movie.

-Predictability: [4 out of 5] Like I said in the beginning of the movie “when it has too many twists, it’s a Nollywood movie” and that applies to this movie. Too many for you to keep up so take my advice and don’t bother attempting to predict it. Just sit back and…. well… sit back and watch.

-Directing/Production: [2 out of 5] They zoom in, they zoom out. The camera descends from the top of the building and comes to the land. The camera does some amazing-uber-techy-looking C curve from one angle to the other and we all ‘ooh’ and ‘aah’ and say things like “what amazing cinematography” (and I know this because na me be the number one culprit). But after seeing some movies, I’ve realized that there is more to good cinematography than a zooming camera (that is just evidence of expensive equipments). Like I said in “The Figurine” review, cinematography is an art and even though it took me long enough to realize it, it doesn’t begin and end with camera motions. So ‘no’ the cinematography in this movie was not that amazing but the cinematography was not torturous. All that can be overlooked but what made it all the more annoying was the ‘direction’. And by direction, I mean the director’s act of telling the actors what they are supposed to do, when to come in, how to say what they have to say, et cetera. This was not any more glaring than in one of the final scenes in which the last daughter runs out, mid tension amid all the Ini-Edo-gun-toting drama and yells out “OMG Trisha! You’re a lesbian”. Pause! *WTF*?

-Acting quality: [2 out of 5] I am beginning to sound like a broken record with this and I can see how I might begin to sound like what modern day folk refer to as a ‘hater’ but it is what it is, most of the acting in this movie was quite a bore. There was no single act that I can point to and say, “Yes! That was impressive” (except maybe a couple Ime Bishop scenes). 

I used to have nothing but excessive love for Abiola Segun Williams, but from the minute she stepped onto the screen in this movie, I couldn’t help but wonder if she had always been this forced. Some scenes were ok but most just seemed really forced

Ginnefine Kanu. Darling, please take a minute from waving your fingernails around like a defensive sword, from widening your eyes like you’re trying to see into my brains, from generally yelling and just act. Stop doing the absolute most and read your character. Not everything requires yelling. I can describe Ginnefine’s acting with two words ‘too much’ (and that, not in a positive way).

Uti Nwachukwu shone in this movie. Not because na him act pass but because of the people he was surrounded by. All of a sudden, he didn’t seem so forced or ‘without emotion’ because there were other people on screen more forced and more incapable of emoting than himself. Ok, to state it simply, I do not believe that Uti is the worst actor there ever was (infact, out of all the models turned actors, he is probably the best) but neither is he that good.

I honestly wonder, whose genius idea it was to include Morris Sesay in this movie though? I will describe Ini Edo’s performance with two words: fair enough. Alexx Ekubo lacked the emotions necessary to carry the viewer along on the ride and this is made glaring in the scene after which he is told that he is not his father’s biological son. 

I’m yet to understand the significance of those two light skinned sisters? Anyway, guest appearance by Susan Peters

-Setting: [3 out of 5] Well done

-Costume/Make-Up: [3 out of 5] Good

-Video Quality: [3 out of 5] Well done

-Soundtrack: [3 out of 5] Fair

-Musical Score: [3 out of 5] Nicely done